Quirky things people do
Do you have things you do that seem perfectly normal to you but might seem odd to someone else? This thought came to mind as I was making some fantastic blueberry muffins (ask me for the recipe) and after creaming the shortening, butter and sugar it was time to put the eggs in. Now I always take the eggs from the right hand side of the carton. I would never think to take an egg from the middle or left end. It’s just what I do.
So it made me think, what else do I do that might annoy the crap out of my husband? (Actually he’s the most easy going bloke in the world so not much gets his irritation going.) When I put my shoes on, I always put on a sock and a shoe and a sock and a shoe. That does make him raise his eyebrows but as he says, “They’re your feet.”
Then I think about sexy lingerie. My husband loves it. No, no.. not on himself — on me. Most of it isn’t comfortable at all. Either it’s lacy and it scratches or the straps are too loose and they fall off my shoulders or it’s satiny and slippery and gets all wadded up when I try to roll over. To compromise I wear it, flaunt around a bit and then I take it off. It’s what I do.
I do the lawn mowing around here and I have a set path that I take. It never varies. Always around to the right and then in concentric circles. I’ve heard it’s bad for the grass but my feet won’t walk another way.
When I take a shower, I have the same issue. I scrub my face with the scratchy thing and then my neck, shoulders, arms and move on down, ending with my feet.
I’m obviously a creature of habit and THAT’S when it hit me. Of course I am and guess where I’m probably just as much a creature of my own quirky? Yep, you got there first. In bed.
So I’ve decided that in order to keep my marriage and our sex life fun and interesting (and not so routine) I’m going to make up a SEXFUN jar. In it I’m going to place little slips of paper with instructions for one adult activity. For instance, the next time we have sex, I’ll start on top. The next time I’ll wear something flimsy — even if it’s only for 5 minutes. The time after that I’ll wake him up with a blowjob. I’d continue but then that’s too much information.
I think it will work. I felt awful when I realized I was probably very routine in my sexual habits. What fun is that?? I will probably always be quirky but my husband and my marriage will be happy.
If you have ideas that are better than my jar, leave me a comment, ok?
We all get into habits in our various daily activities, for me it’s what keeps things sane and my workflow smooth.
Your idea works for lots of us. Don’t forget that the jar should not only have activities. Places and objects can also have a place on the slips of paper.
I think that’s a cool idea. I heard a comedienne one time joke about how every time her fellow did something unusually nice for her — CHA-CHING! — she issued him a cootchie coupon. :o)
You also reminded me of this: I wasn’t a regular watcher of the Dharma & Greg TV show, but I recall one episode where the girl realizes there’s a secret schedule behind their sex life. I don’t recall the details, but let me make up a few examples based on the show’s concept: Every time his football team wins, he asks her to dress up like a sexy cheerleader for a bedroom rah-rah session. Every time he sees a Redi-Wip commercial on TV, that night he smears something edible on her for a sexual romp. When she wears her cute puppy-dog print sleep shirt, he’ll suggest some doggy style sex that night. Etc. She doesn’t know about his system at first, and she thinks he’s just fun and creative, and it’s a win-win situation for him because the pressure is off him to think of fresh things to do. Later on, he explains that he was intimidated by her when they first became a couple, and he wanted to be sure he was as exciting as he thought her to be, so he created a list of secret little triggers so he would keep mixing it up in the bedroom for her.
Of course, that system might not work for you if you’re trying not to be predictable, but it’s a clever idea if you’re trying to introduce different things just for variety! :o) Good luck — I’m sure your partner will appreciate your efforts! And maybe he’ll start to grin every time he sees one of those new Red-Wip commercials that have been on TV lately. :oP